The food struggle is real.

There is zero shame in struggling with food. There are lots of reasons why CPTSD survivors struggle with it. 

But the world can be real judgmental about our struggles with food— and we can be real judgmental of ourselves when it comes to our struggles with food. 

Food is connected to all sorts of touchy, triggery stuff for us. 

It’s connected to literal survival. 

It’s connected to body image. 

It’s connected to comfort. 

It’s connected to pleasure. 

It’s connected to shame. 

Dissociation can make food and eating even more complicated. It’s hard to manage a literal survival behavior that requires presence and consistency when you’re unpredictably in and out of the present time, place, and person. 

We need to meet our struggles with food and eating just like we meet any other trauma symptom or struggle— with realism, patience, and compassion. 

You need to know you don’t have to figure out the eating thing today. Or figure it out perfectly. Or figure it out to anyone else’s satisfaction. 

Eating is one of those things where we often don’t like to even admit we’re struggling, because it’s a “normal” behavior that “normal” people “shouldn’t” struggle with or freak out about. 

F*ck that. This is CPTSD recovery. We left “normal” a few turns back, if you haven’t noticed. 

Navigate the food thing on meal, one snack, one crumb, at a time. 

Know you’re definitely not the first or the last CPTSD survivor to struggle with food or eating.

Know that it gets easier the more we accept that we’re going to struggle with it— and the more we forgive ourselves for struggling with it. 

Know that you deserve to eat, and to even enjoy eating. 

And know that if you don’t right now believe you deserve to eat or enjoy eating, it’s okay. No shame. 

Know that nobody’s mad at you and you’re not in trouble for struggling with eating. 

It’s just something we’re working on, something we’re figuring out. 

No more, no less. 

Easy does it. Breathe; blink; focus.